50-something Moms Blog

Starting anew at 52

Being in my 50’s is turning out to be a rich time of personal growth.  Who knew?!

Unexpectedly derailed professionally at age 52, I slowed way down and took a big pause.  Standing in the rubble of what was, I saw how myopic I had been.  In being so committed to my mission to bringing the health and well-being benefits of yoga education to schools, I had sacrificed my own well-being and integrity.  I was so busy doing my work, that there was no space between responsibilities to enjoy life and be there for others.  I was out of alignment with my principles and goals and justifying it rather than addressing it. I knew the universal law of energy that states: the means = the end, but I was not abiding by it.  The how and what were not integrated and so, unsustainable.  The gap created a weakness and finally everything came tumbling down.  The good news is, according to the Mayan view of the world, I was right on schedule.  Mayan’s call year 52, the year of starting over, which I’ve done.  And what a blessing… 

 I work from home now, slowly growing my new business. I enjoy my beautiful life.  I have time to support and be there my husband, son and self.  I’ve even been able to get certified as a Family Constellation Facilitator and serve my community in a new and deeply fulfilling way.  I’m still dedicated to enhancing health and empowerment but I am careful to do so in a way that works for my life.  Instead of running, traveling, training, writing full-tilt for a national organization, I develop and produce yoga-based movement enrichment resources for pre-school children, families and pre-schools, which I sell myself.    I am focused on a niche and love how my work is evolving.  I see how much more of a contribution I am to everything when I sustain my own balanced state.  I am the poster child for the saying: we teach what we need to learn. 

Bad News for Middle-Aged Couch Potatoes

Like most women, I struggle with my weight -- and the battle has only gotten worse with age.

Having a child at 40 didn't help. I didn't gain all that much with my pregnancy - but I didn't lose a lot of it after the baby was born, and 10 years later, I'd packed on so many additional pounds that I weighed more than I had while pregnant.

So I got serious. Two years ago, I completed a 56-pound weight loss regimen, and vowed that I would never get to the point where I'd have to go through that again.

Since then, I've regained eight pounds and I'm scared, because no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to shake them back off.

Last week, while listening to a report on NPR, I understood why: A new study published by the Journal of the American Medical Association concludes that middle aged women must exercise one hour a day just to maintain their current weight. 

Welcome to my World

Don't be jealous but I am married to the best husband and father in the world! Sure, some might disagree but I have to say that I have truly hit the jackpot when it comes to this man of mine. Over the last twenty-seven years of marriage, he has stepped up and risen to the occasion of spousal and parental greatness in my eyes. He has never shied away from a diaper change with any of our five children or our grandchild. He willingly steps in and shares with me this juggling act of orthodontist visits, shuttling one kid to tae kwon do en route to picking up another from after school tutoring to get home just in time to get a call from the other kid who has managed to lock her keys in her car...again...and so on and so on because that is what life raising five children at all ages and stages is about. He appreciates that, yes, doing the dishes can be foreplay...which might explain why my kitchen is so clean.

Yup! I'm the lucky one!

Physicians Also Need Reform

Like many, I have followed the on-going health care debates closely. I fall on the side of universal coverage for all. I cringe, every December, when my husband brings home the specifics of his company's health care coverage for the next year. Small families are discriminated against. As a family of three, we pay more for coverage than say a single parent with five children.

This year we had the option of paying the same amount for less coverage or maintaining 2009 coverage for a mere 30% increase. We opted for the same cost with less coverage and higher deductibles. We are praying no emergencies require us to meet that higher deductible.

Response to the H1N1 Vaccine and a Culture of Extremes

My family finally received our H1N1 vaccine last week. The county health department opened several storefronts through the area where the vaccine was available for free with no restrictions. No appointment necessary. We were in and out in 10 minutes.

The public reaction to the H1N1 vaccine, seems to me a microcosm of how we react to everything - in the extreme. When the H1N1 virus was in the daily news, the shown reaction was either (a) avoid the vaccine totally because it was unsafe or (b) stand in a line in the frigid weather for hours with small children in tow.

Thoughts on Health Care After the Swine Flu

I'm scratching my head over the state of health care, but I'm not talking about insurance exchanges, the Stupak Amendment or the "public option."  I'm wondering why we are in a country where you can't get a flu shot, some doctors are holding back Tamiflu and you're treated like a criminal for a box of decongestant tablets.

I had hoped against hope that the swine flu would bypass our house.  I was still on the fence about whether we would get the H1N1 vaccine, but we were diligent about hand washing and sanitizing. Our pediatrician's office had received only a small supply of the vaccine and it had gone to the high risk patients (Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore hardly received any of the vaccine, but I guess if I worked at Citigroup or Goldman Sachs, I could have scored at least one dose for our daughter).

Lying about Health Care Reform

I live in Canada these days. My second husband is Canadian, and my daughter and I are permanent residents. The odds are long that I will ever be an actual resident of the United States again, so I don't really have an urgent personal stake in the health care debate. I have health care because I am a legal resident of the province of Alberta. I don't have to worry about what will happen if I should be diagnosed with a terminal illness as my late husband was. I don't need to jump through hoops of fire to secure disability status so I can have access to provincial health care as my late husband needed to do in order to receive help from Medicaid. My being ill would not threaten the roof over my daughter's head. It wouldn't bankrupt my husband. 

But I have family in the States and many friends for whom this is not so. It angers me to hear an elected official not tell the truth about something that is so very important.

Yesterday I read that Sen. Grassley, in a town hall meeting in Iowa, had perpetuated the idea of the so-called "death panels" that would result from the health care reform currently being labored over in Congress and I thought, What? That's not true. How could my former Senator, a man I thought was above the party line rhetoric that believes half-truths are as good as truth in a pinch, perpetuate information that simply isn't factual?