50-something Moms Blog

Sat Down to Write a Post

I sat down to write a post for 50-Something Moms blog and here’s what happened:  

1. Walked into my office, opened Word.
2. Always Singing Daughter came in and wanted to know what happened to the granola we bought two days ago. Went to investigate and recalled old, senile lab, Ginger, pulled open the drawer where it was and ate it along with a baguette and half a loaf of sandwich bread.
3. Went to add sandwich bread to grocery list.
4. Wrote three words for blog.
5. Realized it was 11am and Always Sleeping Son was once again sleeping the day away. Went to get him up. Put towels in dryer.
6. Came back to study, realized I needed to take photo to go along with blog post. Went to get camera. Side tracked by kids questions. Went back to study, forgot camera. Wrote five more words.
7. Heard son and daughter in kitchen, went to let them know I would like son to hook up DVR to TV and daughter to wash car.
8. Go back to study.

Camp Vegas?

Sunday morning I sat down to read the newspaper. Generally, I flip quickly through the inserts to see the Target ads but this morning there was a magazine insert called Camp Vegas for Grownups. My husband has wanted to take a get away trip to Las Vegas for ages. It’s a never held any attraction for me; not a gambler, not big into shows, hate high heat. But I thought I should check it out. A trip to Vegas would make a nice surprise for our anniversary this year.

So consider the cover photo - a young woman with 0.0% body fat in a string bikini, in her early 20s. And, the title is Camp Vegas. Best I can tell from the photos in the rest of the magazine, all the women who go to Vegas bring bikinis and evening gowns, have hair half way down their back, breast enhancements and aren’t a day over 25. Well, except for Cher, there was an ad for Cher, who is performing at Caesars Palace. Based on the Photoshopping, cosmetic enhancements and whatever, I think Cher is, oh 30? Gee, I think I’d fit right in with my Lands End Slender Suit.

Is Costco a Good Deal?

According to my Alexa tool bar, 15 Things Not to Buy in Bulk was one of the hottest hits on the web today. I think it helped that whoever was optimizing SEO (search engine optimization) added, “Is Costco a Good Deal?” onto the title bar and that grabbed people’s attention. It grabbed mine because anyone raising a family finds it easier to purchase things in bulk.

As I scanned the article I was surprised at some of the items on the list. It got me curious about who wrote it. I did a little sleuthing. The author graduated from college in 2008. I don’t know for sure, but chances are high he does not have a family of his own, or if he does he might have a newborn or a very young child. In any event, some of the items on this list surprised me and I think they’d surprise you (assuming you are reading this blog because you are a mom.)

Torn Between Sympathy and Irritation

TO: Mom with Two Young Kids Running Around Restaurant
FROM: Experienced Mom of Three Whose Kids are Young Adults
RE: Torn Between Sympathy and Irritation

You and your two darling girls were having breakfast with three women in a coffee shop last Friday. I smiled when I saw the group of you chatting away, knowing how cathartic it is to vent and luxuriate in intelligent conversation. I recalled how I yearned for adult conversation during those years when I was home with my small children and felt my brain turning to mush.

But then your girls finished eating, and in the way of small children, were instantly ready to move on. The next thing I knew they were dancing by my table and I was frantically covering the sharp corners afraid someone was going to crack their head. Waitresses carrying hot coffee and plates of food were having a hard time negotiating around the.

Three Dogs and a Cat - A Cautionary Tale (Tail)

Two years ago my oldest, ultra-responsible, plan and goal-oriented daughter was finishing up her freshman year in college and moved into an apartment. There she got the brilliant idea she needed a puppy.

I received a phone call that went like this:
RESPONSIBLE DAUGHTER: cheerful, excited voice “Mom, I’ve been researching puppies. I want a miniature dachshund. It’s a perfect breed for me and now I’m in an apartment I can have one.”

ME: stunned silence, then… “Gee honey, I don’t think that’s such a good idea. You’ll be tied to your apartment, and what about the Fall when you have to travel for athletic events?”

RESPONSIBLE DAUGHTER: a little deflated “I’ve got it all figured out. X and Y promised to help me and they’ll keep it when I’m gone.”

ME: “Bad idea.”

Exhausted by the Green Barrage

Okay, I know this sounds politically incorrect, but I was pleased to see that the Canadians agree with me. The results of this Cascades Index Survey is titled Canadians Have Spoken: Practice, Don't Preach Green! The survey found that Canadians are very environmentally aware and quietly take all kinds of eco-friendly actions. But, 58% of the respondents said they felt environmentalism was like a new religion and 54% were tired of the lecturing. I am, too.

I live in one of the most environmentally aware cities in the United States. Our community started a recycling center, Eco-Cycle, 33 years ago and it continues to be a forward thinking, innovative model to the world. Because of Eco-Cycle I’ve been recycling for almost 30 years. In the early days that involved sorting everything into bins in my garage and driving them to the recycling center. I have a mulching mower. I compost all vegetable waste in my backyard.

Spring Break Post Mortem

(Heavy sigh.) This is a picture of one of the mountain of linens I’ll be washing now that my twins have returned to college after spring break.  Yesterday I went to the basement to workout. I grabbed the phone so it would be close by. The phone rang, I tried to answer and discovered the battery was dead. Why was the battery dead? That would be because the kids unplugged the phone to charge their computers.

I went to the fridge to get salsa to put on scrambled eggs today, but alas, there was none to be found, even though last week there were two full jars. While looking for the salsa I found an orange juice container with a tablespoon of juice left in it, an empty container of sour cream and three half drunk containers of Gatorade.